I have the privilege of being the officiant at two weddings this July, and this has provided the inspiration to meditate on, pray on, and research weddings through the ages.
As we remember, Jesus very first miracle was turning water into wine at a wedding feast! Other that having barrels of wine, we wonder what other traditions surrounded an ancient Jewish wedding. The Jewish family would have been very familiar with the Hebrew Scriptures and would have known Genesis 2:18, 22, “The Lord God said, ’It is not good for the man to be alone. I will make a helper suitable for him.” The Lord God made a woman from the rib He had taken out of the man, and he brought her to the man.” Thus Adam’s helper would have been of one flesh with Adam, different but equal.
At the time of Christ, a couple would have been betrothed (engaged) at the age of twelve or thirteen, and the betrothal was initiated by the families of the bride and groom. The second stage of the betrothal would have been a sort of prenuptial agreement, a legally binding contract that could be broken only by divorce. Though the couple did not yet live together, the contract could only be broken by an act of adultery which was punishable by stoning. The length of the betrothal was about a year. The special ceremony began with a procession of the groom and companions to the home of the bride, where the bride and her companions would join the procession back to the groom’s home for a special supper. The parents and friends blessed the couple, the father of the bride drew up a written marriage contract the couple was then escorted to a special bridal chamber, while the festivities continued for up to a week. Talk about a BIG PARTY!
How have our wedding traditions changed over the years? We still involve companions and family in the ceremonies, we still wear special clothes, we still sign a legal document, we have the understanding that the two become one flesh through a mystical union of hearts and lives and we still like to celebrate with a Big Party!!
YES! We should celebrate the uniting of two in marriage because the Christian scriptures lead us to believe that God designed marriage to reflect His image. The book of Genesis tells us we are created in His image as individuals, and it follows that couples also to reflect His image. Just what are the images of God that we are called to reflect?
First Corinthians 13:4-7 has become one of the favorite scriptures quoted at weddings because it speaks of Love, the kind of love shown to us by our creator, and the kind of love we are called to reflect to the world. To quote from the Passion translation of the Bible, “Love is large and incredibly patient. Love is gentle and consistently kind to all. It refuses to be jealous when blessings come to someone else. Love does not brag about one’s achievements nor inflate its own importance. Love does not traffic in shame and disrespect, nor selfishly seek its own honor. Love is not easily irritated or quick to take offense. Love joyfully celebrates honesty and finds no delight in what is wrong. Love is a safe place of shelter, for it never strops believing the best for others. Love never takes failure as defeat for it never gives up.”
May God abundantly bless those who are joined in marriage this summer, and may their love remind us all of Gods command to Love One Another as He loves us!
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